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Review: Dove Ultimate Clear Antiperspirant

August 24, 2008
Dove Ultimate Clear Smooth Cashmere

Dove Ultimate Clear Smooth Cashmere

“Antiperspirant” is a funny word when you actually type it out, isn’t it? Anyway. Even a self-care-impaired woman like me knows that it doesn’t behoove one to run around smelling like some laundry someone forgot and left in their gym locker for a week. The whole thing that ladies don’t sweat? Mmm, yeah. Maybe some of you don’t, but I am blessed with sweat glands that could possibly generate a scenic waterfall if they had been reincarnated in a more thrilling form. Also, I have very sensitive skin, and lots and lots of contact allergies. Let me assure you, this combination has made finding a deodorant well nigh impossible.

In high school, I used Teen Spirit — do they even make that anymore? I don’t remember what scents I tried, probably anything with “ocean” or “fresh” or “shower” in the name. I read a lot of Seventeen magazine and owned a bunch of Caboodles and Sea Breeze and did all my beauty shopping at Thrift Drug. My sister got busted shoplifting a candy bar at Thrift Drug, but that’s another story. So! Deodorant, right? (And I know that really I’m talking about antiperspirants, but I’m too lazy to type that out all the time.)  As far as I can remember, the Teen Spirit worked fine, until the day when I put it on and my armpits started to itch. A lot. I didn’t figure out the source of irritation until one time when I was too lazy to put deodorant on, and miraculously… no itch.

Initially I just tried a different fragrance from Teen Spirit, but that didn’t help at all. I then tried other brands, which I will not detail because really I doubt you care THAT much about what’s on my armpits, and the same thing happened with all of them. After a few months, my body seemed to reject every deodorant I tried. About four years ago, I was in the deodorant aisle in kind of a panic because I was pretty sure I’d used every single product that didn’t smell like Old Spice, and I thought I’d either have itchy pits or people-repellent odor for the rest of my life.

And then I saw some Dove deodorant. My sister’s (not the candy bar one) shower was filled with Dove products, but I’d never tried any because frankly I always found their packaging to be incredibly blah. It all looked like old lady stuff, and I was too young and hip (ha ha) for that. (If you also realize that I made most beauty product purchases based on packaging, you win a special prize.) Anyway, I was desperate, and the Dove was there. I found a scent (Original, I think, or Fresh Clean, or something — I hate flowery smells that make me sneeze) that wasn’t too bad, and I bought it. And used it. And here’s the thing, it WORKED. I smelled good, and I was once again able to go out in public without surreptitiously trying to scratch my armpits (the gorilla look is never good).

And here I am, four years later, the girl who used to have to change deodorants every several months, still using Dove. Right now I use their Ultimate Clear in Smooth Cashmere, which I think smells nice — the best word I can think of is “soft,” which is also how I would describe my favorite lotion that J&J ruined by changing the scent, but that’s a story for another time. Soft and enveloping and kind of pillowy. It’s nice. If you’re looking for a new deodorant, give it a shot, especially if you have sensitive skin. I’ve never had trouble finding it at any drugstore, grocery store, or Target. Oh, and it doesn’t leave white marks on my clothes, either, which is a nice bonus. And it doesn’t pill up and make gross little balls of God only knows what by the end of the day. Two thumbs up.

One other note: I have been known to occasionally throw some deodorant down there where my legs meet my, you know, stuff. (Hey. It gets sweaty in the summer, especially if I’m sitting down for a long time.) I have never had any unpleasant reaction in that area, either. I do keep a separate stick of deodorant for the purpose, though, because otherwise that just sounds ooky and freaky-weird.

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